#365 Love is not about being single, it is about being social

Love behind bars! Can love bloom behind bars? 

Great news! I've discovered there is a dating site for just about everyone!

I recently heard about a dating site for people over 50 and decided to check it out. What I thought would be an easy search on my Mac made me realize a couple of things.  First, my navigation skills on the computer obviously need another crash course at the Genius Bar at Apple.  I got updates on so many things I don’t need let alone even know how to use. Then and most importantly....I found websites I wasn't even searching for!

I was beginning to get a bit frustrated when... I got some comic relief!  You’ve heard of America’s funniest videos...well, welcome to the world of ONLINE DATING sites! 

Believe it or NOT – they can get really funny!

These are two of my "fave" online dating sites...which one would you sign up for?


Pay for a woman's breast implants and get a date with her.... 

This is also interesting...if you like felons! www.MeetAnInmate.com

Think I'll keep looking for that 50+ site!  



PS: stay tuned for some info on that 50+ dating site...whenever I do find it! 

Watch live streaming video from ideacity at livestream.com

While checking out the Zoomer Singles website I happened to come across this video from Ideacity. Jane Juska talks about the intriguing way she researched her first book, My Late life Adventures in Sex and Romance. She put out a personal ad and embarked on a journey to have the most sex she could with men she liked, before she turned 67 years old.  I think she could teach us all a little something about life.  

That you're never too old to pursue your dreams.

Do you have dreams? 





Here’s a quote I found from an amazing young writer -  C.Joybell C. 

“They say a good love is one that sits you down, gives you a drink of water, and pats you on top of the head. But I say a good love is one that casts you into the wind, sets you ablaze, makes you burn through the skies and ignite the night like a phoenix; the kind that cuts you loose like a wildfire and you can't stop running simply because you keep on burning everything that you touch! I say that's a good love; one that burns and flies, and you run with it!” ― C. JoyBell C.

I love her image of the fire burning...

It's how I feel in my soul these days, like I am on fire and on the verge of igniting my life!  I want to keep stoking the flames and it is how I want to experience myself. I love the heat...well, maybe not the hot flashes! 

Pulling into Toronto train station right now for some meetings.  Then back to Montreal to check out the Bridal Boudoir Affair!




Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus


A male subscriber wrote me this letter expressing his personal views on being single at 40.  Here’s what he thinks. 

Dear Cheryl,  

We've all heard the quote "Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars” and as my years pass the wisdom of this expression rings truer.

Regardless of what side of the fence you sit on, the one thing that I am certain of is that men and women are just different and that each sex holds special qualities and powers.


It's kind of like children's superhero. Not all hold the same powers but when they team up together they become unstoppable.

I call this "superhero unstoppable love."

So how do you find that perfect superhero partner? THAT'S the million dollar question!

After being in a relationship for 14 years, at the ripe old/young age of 40, I’m caught in this no man’s land. I’m too old to hang at the clubs with the twenty-something’s, and too young to do the charity ball dinners.

Married friends are busy with their families and often unreliable as wingmen.

However from a man's perspective…finding love is all about finding that special connection and then providing security, shelter and happiness.

Let’s look at my options.

1. I've tried the online dating thing. It could work late at night when you are watching an e-harmony.com commercial, but my experience is that most women think you're some weirdo hacker or some rapist trying to lure you into a dark alley.

2. In your 40's post divorce,  dating gets much more complicated. I finally meet a great girl. Now we have to take into consideration there are kids involved. So we can't see each other on Tuesdays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

3. Find a 36 year old girl who has no kids or ex husband and start from scratch.  Hanging out is fun but it doesn't take 3 weeks until she starts asking "what are we doing together?"

4.  Go younger and try to avoid that biological clock thing. But my texting skills are not up to par - acronyms for communication are archaic to say the least- "TTYL, CYRB, ALAP, and my favorite AYSOS - Are you Stupid or Something!"

So my question is: How do you find your superhero partner while lugging around a bag of kryptonite?


A Lonely Superman



I’m going to give him my opinion next Thursday... What do you think about his bag of kryptonite and how would you answer his question?  Submit your opinion in Share your story.




To date these days we need a whole new set of skills.  It’s making me crazy that the language of romance has been reduced to 3 – 7 capital letters in the form of acronyms. Text is taking over and RMUBAR – Romance is messed up beyond all recognition! 

MOTOS N2M MOTSS should learn that texting is a CWOT and will result in CUATU!


* Translation:  Members of the opposite sex, not to mention Members of the same sex should learn that texting is a complete waste of time and will result in see you around the universe. Need I say more?


How do YOU feel about texting and dating... does it drive you crazy? Click on Share Your Story and tell me all about it! 




Picture this! The Costa Rica Pacific coast... I’m at the magnificent Hacienda Panilla Resort waking up to a glorious day of sunshine.  I get dressed, grab a little breakfast with my son and off to the beach. I’m on vacation, participating in a fabulous fitness retreat organized by my gym, Victoria Park in Montreal.

We kick off on Day one with what would become the regular 9am circuit program lead by trainer to the pros, Paul Gagne


Cheryl in Plank -  "Where's my Pina Colada?"" When do I get my Piña Colada?"

I am already grunting and groaning after the warm up but I finally did make it through the rigorous workout along with all the other gym members on the trip.  

After the intense session I collapsed onto a lounge chair by the pool along with the group when we started discussing all the outdoor activities they planned to do over the following week. OMG...can I please catch my breath first?

On the agenda: zip lining, tubing down the rapids, mountain climbing, horseback riding mud baths and hot springs, oh, now they have my attention!. My head is spinning but I'm also starting to think...these are all ways singles with adventurous spirits can take part in activities and meet new people.

Immediately I jump into research mode et voila! Fitness Singles.com  

On a Zip Line -  Where's my Tarzan? I’m Jane on a zip line – where’s my Tarzan?


Once on the site - I filled out my online profile. AGAIN! The difference here is that you identify the top 3 activities you participate in on a regular basis and skill level.  

I had to stretch my imagination a bit to find number 2 and 3, as the only exercise I truly adore is dance. If I could take a pill and remain fit and trim I would never do another circuit, yoga or Pilates class again... but shhhh!

10 minutes later…!! ... I got my first response.

A 48 year old gentlemen whose photos included one of him floating on his back in a ocean with abs of steel and one with him rock climbing in a G-string with buns to match. 

Welcome to Fitness Singles! I’ve just entered the world of the super fit. Maybe I need to learn more sports...?

All kidding aside...for all you active sports and fitness minded individuals, I think that having a first date that revolves around a hobby or passion that two people share makes for easier and more relaxed interaction.

I will climb the highest mountain for the right man! I will climb the highest mountain for the right man! 


It's the jock and jockess’s answer to a matchmaking company like Cook and Date.com  that’s for foodies like me.  Check it out! 






The man that almost stole my heart and my blog!

I’ve met a man online. He’s a great guy.  But who would have thought a wrench could alter my plans to find love.  This wrench is a fabulous man.

Oh no....Wait, not yet!

I'm supposed to meet you in 6 months or so and then write about how we slowly fall in love and live happily ever after!

We had one date, and then I realized I had to tell him about my blog and my exploration into the world of dating.  That big truth or dare moment came after our second date, he had to know.   Would he understand the intent of my quest?

I lost this potential relationship to this blog. He understood my commitment and passion and agreed that sharing my journey was an excellent idea as many singles could benefit. He just didn’t want to be a part of this journey - but he did encourage me to spread my wings and stay true to my conviction.

I fell in love on February 14th 2013.... Not with another person but with my blog... and what it could become.  I want to help others who find themselves in the quandary of being lost in how to meet people.   With every new day I’m finding myself more and more energized knowing we singles have options, lots and lots of them and I intend to continue to find, explore and share those revelations.

365daystofindlove.com is not only where I want to end up, I’m hoping it becomes a place where anyone can go to 365 days of any year to find ways that suits them individually to expand their own social circle.

And who knows, maybe Mr. Wonderful will someday re-emerge.




Regrets, should they spell out our life?

Meet Brandon and Nicole Far.

They are newlyweds and they’re celebrating their nuptials in Costa Rica while I am here travelling with my son, waiting to finalize my divorce.  It’s kind of ironic that our lives are at two complete ends of the spectrum, yet we share a philosophy of life. Both Brandon and I believe in the saying:

"We will never regret the things we do, only the things we don't!"

I believe I am where I am right now in life because of how I lived, choices I made,  and I have no regrets. I believe that I have a “history”, a positive way to look at it, and not "baggage", which to me is negative.

Brandon has so much conviction and a positive outlook on life that he spelled out the motto in the form of a tattoo for the whole world to see. No Regrets.

I turned regret into an analogue,  spelling out what the word means to me, and forever changing its intention in my mind.


R is Reflection on the history we have
E is Embrace where we are today
G is Growth and our continued learning
R is Rejuvenating and reinventing ourselves
E is Explore and experience all that life gives us
T is Translate all we learned from our past into a more fulfilled tomorrow and better relationship
S is Sharing the positive with someone

I have no regrets.

Do you?



Someone told me that people are happy being single. Are we?

Or do we just say we’re happy because we are afraid or shy about admitting that we wish we had someone in our lives.

If we want someone to be with and for whatever reason, there is no relationship at this moment in our lives; does it mean we are not desirable?

I think putting ourselves out there makes us feel vulnerable. I am reminded of the high school prom.  I pretended I had no real desire to attend the dance. I told myself, "I hate school”, “why spend more time in an activity associated with the bane of my existence” and “the thought of going has no appeal”.  That was my mantra, up until Mr. Teenage Dreamy asked me to the prom.  

Those negative thoughts were actually my protection.  I needed to hide behind the security of self, but in fact, it was the insecurity of being rejected.

I think those same fears have existed within me with regards to my attempts to date up until now.  I was wanting a relationship, and yet I was worried about being accepted and being desired.

That wallflower syndrome of high school has reappeared – even though it’s hidden underneath my exterior of  - I am a strong independent woman and I enjoy my life fully and appreciate who I am and the life I have created and I am okay about being single.

Well I am!    I would just prefer to share my life with someone!

I want to go to the prom!   Don’t you?