#365 Love is not about being single, it is about being social

I am still fairly new at this dating thing but amazed as to how fast some people start talking about how they feel about someone they have gone out with once or twice. Both men and women I have talked with, wondering whether they think they can end up with someone after dating for 2 weeks.

This kind of dialogue brings me back to my high school days. I remember meeting a boy and after the first kiss writing "Cheryl and BOB 4ever" or the classic movies sequence where someone sits scribbling "Mrs. Cheryl Smith".

My question is- after how many dates should one really contemplate if the person in their lives is the "right one"? When do we start to make seeing them a priority or asking the other person to make us one in their lives?

There are individuals that I have met and right from the beginning there was no connection. In a case like that, all I am confident of is there will be no second date.

Then there are people I meet that I find intriguing, bright, witty and there is a natural chemistry. I look forward to hopefully meeting them again and would enjoy the process of getting to know more about them. ONE STEP AT A TIME! No pressure.

The key for me, is to decipher if there is a platonic or romantic connection and let the intention be known. From then on, I want to take my time and appreciate being together without expectations and complications.

I recently became reacquainted with a man I met 2 years ago and learned certain relationships can’t be rushed, even when there is immediate chemistry. I truly believe that, if and when its meant to be, it will be.

Timing is everything and patience is a virtue!

Where do you weigh in on timing in relationships?





As a self-proclaimed closet fashionista, my style has always been my own and I pride myself in knowing the appropriate attire for most situations and dress accordingly. However, every once in a while I stand in front of my dresser and dread deciding what to wear when it comes to going on a date.

I am sure you will agree there are several scenarios that can make this a stressful period, such as:

1) You have been given a time when you will be picked up, but no clue as to where you are going. Here is where most women go to the simple black dress but no, not I- that would be too simple. (I like complicated and red) lol

2) Blind dates where you are not sure how tall your suitor will be. When you are 5'8" and love stilettos as I do, that can pose problems!

3) Times where you are told to wear comfty clothes but not sure what that really entails. I know people who are only comfortable when they get home, take off their bras and get into PJ's. Surely that would be classified as unacceptable date attire.

4) The ultimate dilemma is when he says "we are going to a friends pool party". Here is where you need to decide to bare all or not. I already crossed that road once and you can hear about it in my blog “bathing beauty bachelorettes”

Well ladies and gents, I have found the answer to this fashion dilemma and her name is Jennifer Kelton. Jennifer has been a leading fashion stylist for the "who's who" in sunny California for years.  She has now extended her company to help those who need to dress for their night out and wanting to look "oh so picture perfect". The company is called DRESS FOR THE DATE and Jennifer is your personal dating stylist done one on one or by Skype. Either way she will peruse through your dresser and help you create the perfect coordinated outfit for that impressionable first encounter. For a small fee, she will coordinate the rest of your wardrobe for future dates.

Give her a call, what do you have to lose? Well, maybe that old sweater that has reindeer and snowflakes on the front that grandma knitted.


Have you ever had a fashion faux pas?

Tell me your funniest memory in love stories!




"Just keeps on going and going"

Until now!

Slogans are meant to stick in our minds and trigger a repulse action of memory recognition. I find there are times that for no apparent reason, some of the classics from my younger days keep chiming in at random.

Today’s epiphany was the realization that life sometimes seems to overwhelm me of late. Like many other readers have expressed, the thought of going out is often exhausting. For an extreme social bunny that is a biggie and something I have rarely experienced

"Calgon take me away". To my bath I will go and hopefully after a good long soak, I will feel a bit more like myself- recharged, relaxed and ready to tackle my day and night. I will put on a dress, a bit of make up and as Nike says "Just do it!"

My 365 countdown continues… "Time keeps on ticking"

What are some of your favorite slogans?





After meeting someone for the first time and hitting it off, there is always the dreaded number exchange. If you're like most women, you're always worried that he won't call. Well ladies, Matthew Hussey has the secret to making sure he calls you back!

Give him something to look forward to!
When you give a guy your number, ideally you want him to be checking every last digit because he can't wait to call thatamazing girl he met last night. So how do you make him look forward to calling? 

The most important part of getting a guy to call you is to make your conversation beforehand as intriguing and fun as possible. I actually run you through scenarios of each point in the Man Myth video which you can check out here: 

1. Offer him an intriguing date
In a nutshell, you want to avoid the boring clichés of numberexchanges. Don't offer him your number saying something like "we should go for drinks sometime". It's obvious and it does nothing to build his intrigue in you as a person. 

What you ideally want to do is make sure you talk about something you're passionate about doing early in the conversation. Or if you haven't been to the zoo in ages and really fancy it, mention that as well. Then when it comes to exchanging numbers it's as easy as saying: "Ok, give me a call and we'll do that zoo trip".

2. Make him want to earn your time!
Next time you're out and want to exchange numbers with a guy, try out this line: "Look my friends are going to kill me, we're supposed to be on a girly night tonight, I shouldn't even be talking to you right now". 
Any time you use a line like this that, it says "We shouldn't be doing this", it builds his intrigue and makes him want to be involved even more. He'll want to call you to earn more of your time. 
3. Here's a great game you can play
Set silly rules for when he calls you. 
Just before you give him your number, you can playfully say: "Ok, you should know though that I have a couple of simple rules for giving out my number to new guys. You can't call me at midnight drunk telling me you can't wait to see me, or text me asking for pictures. If that's cool with you then I'm happy to give it out, but I'm warning you!"
Say this with a silly grin on your face and he'll see that you'reteasing him. You might think this line comes off as arrogant, but it doesn't if you say it with the right tone and facial expression. Guys like that you don't take the number exchange really seriously and he'll look forward to calling you more. 
4. Create a running joke
If you create a running joke it gives a guy an easy way to initiate conversation on the phone. 

One great way of doing this is role-playing: For example, you might say early in conversation say to a guy "Me and my friends were talking earlier about what superpower we would have. Mine's invisibility obviously; what would you go for?"
Once he tells you, you can joke with him about how both of you would use your powers. 
That way, when you swap numbers you can say: "Ok superman, call me up when you need some help fighting crime".
Since a lot of guys worry about what to say on the phone, this gives him an easy, low-pressure way of calling you up to initiate conversation". 
What are your secrets to making sure a man calls you back?

Either way- we have to decide which side of the bridge we want to end up on.





Last week I was on a date and all I wanted was for the ocean to open up and swallow me into the depths of its abyss.

I sat patiently across from this gentleman as he shared his life story for 55 minutes- which may not sound excessive, however we were only together 65 minutes in total. It was as if he was swimming for his life and didn't want to come up for air, for fear of missing a stroke. In the meantime, I was drowning in boredom, hypothermia setting in from inactivity as conversation was onesided. The only life preserver was that I had a meeting to attend. Thank goodness we only signed up for the 50 meter front crawl. The real problem was he only knew the sidestroke- so I was always meters ahead. At the finish line I said my good bye - did the swimmers tuck, roll and pushed off.

Guess every once in a while, we need to enter the water at our own risk because if we don't take the plunge we will never learn to swim. Now I understand why most dating coaches and matchmakers suggest we make our first encounters short and sweet- TREAD WATER!

Lesson learned for the future: never dive into the water before knowing if there are any rocks!





There is a sequel to my comedic metaphor of Costadina MG's blog post about the spoon and the fork. Consider this when contemplating your choice of which utensil you would choose- if only one could be had.
 The fork is sleek, long lined and retains its cool even when piercing into hot meaty flesh. User beware however, every once in a while it has a habit of piercing us with its prickly tines and we get hurt.

The spoon on the other hand feeds us comfort like mashed potatoes, cereal, soup and ice cream. Smooth in nature, the spoon tends to take on the elements that surround it and glids gently over our tongue.The spoon feed us almost anything- but try to eat a bowl of soup with a fork.

The choice seems obvious as to which to reach for.

My solution to all of this?

I say- eat spaghetti where the two work as one to satisfy our desire for comfort.


The spoon can do everything the fork can. Is the reverse true?



There's no hope in your game if there's a dope in your lane.

Need i say more?

If after the first or second date you are asking if the person you went out with is genuine, then they probably are not.

Here is my drivers manual which I passed on to a friend today.

Use your internal GPS (go past settling)

Signal right turn, push the pedal to the metal and find an alternate route.

Don't forget you have a rear view mirror too.


How long would you stay in a relationship you know is taking you down the wrong road?





Aurora Borealis- a dancing light show that happens in the sky, as a result of a collision between electrically charged particles from the sun and the earths atmosphere.

This natural phenomena best describes the commotion that my computer has been demonstrating, as my screen is lighting up like the sky due to match.com. In this case, the sun and earth are replaced by man and woman. I have never received so many winks, likes, and emails, than I have in the past few weeks. 

Seems summer brings people back to life in more ways than one. After a long winter and being content to stay in hibernation, many people want to get out and be active and many want to do so with a partner.

According to things I have read, the instinct for companionship draws many back to the computer at this time of the year. Matchmaker Susan Alper confirmed the same. The hope is to connect with someone that will enjoy those summer walks, bike rides, tennis games or a pitcher of sangria on a terrace, while talking and holding hands.

Just think, by the next Aurora Borealis we could be neatly tucked away in our warm cave- snuggled with that summer love, enjoying the next light show together.

I'm hoping to create my own light show with the colors of summer. How about you?